“By the end of high school, as many as one-third of girls
from financially comfortable families can exhibit
clinically significant symptoms of anxiety.”
The Price of Privilege, Madeline Levine, Ph.D.
“Boys from affluent families also have elevated rates of anxiety and depression early in high school,” according to esteemed researcher Madeline Levine.
The levels of anxiety and depression in teens and young adults today is alarming…
… particularly with kids from “privileged” families. *
Their anxiety is palpable. They talk about it all the time. They use catastrophic language.
“My anxiety is crippling.”
“I can’t take it anymore.”
“I hate everything.”
Sometimes things are good, but the emotional volatility is extreme. One minute things are perfect… it’s the best day ever. The next, it’s the absolute end of the world.
As a parent, it is difficult to know what to do… how to respond.
On one hand, you want to take your children seriously and be as supportive as possible. On the other, you really don’t know whether they are catastrophizing because that’s just the way they talk or if they are actually on the brink of a complete meltdown.
Anxiety is self-perpetuating. The more anxious you think you are, the more anxious you are.
And when you believe you are at the mercy of your free-floating anxiety – with no tools for managing it – you feel even more anxious.
That’s where I can help.
There are skills we can learn to take control of our anxiety, manage our emotions, and relax our minds and bodies. Anyone can learn them. Everyone needs them. We should teach them in schools, but we rarely do.
I teach them to all of my clients. No matter what they come to me for, I teach these skills as I help them work through their presenting issues.
The Power of Skills-Based Counseling
By the nature of their age, teens and young adults are in transition. Transitions are hard. Transitions require resilience. Whether someone is struggling with debilitating anxiety; recovering from a setback, failure, or loss in their life; or grappling with a decision about “what’s next,” resilience skills apply.
How we think about things matters.
What we believe matters.
How we take care of ourselves matters.
Skills-based counseling is about seizing the opportunity to help clients with their specific goals and challenges and… to teach them skills that will serve them beyond that specific issue.
Applying resilience training to counseling with teens and young adults gives them skills that help them transition into adulthood – and empower them for the rest of their lives.
*For an excellent overview of the research and statistics of this phenomenon, I recommend Madeline Levine’s seminal book, The Price of Privilege.
The first step on the road to empowerment is to reach out.
One of the most difficult aspects of being a parent is watching your child suffer and not knowing how to help. You want to sweep in and make everything okay; but even if you could, that wouldn’t solve the problem.
What your child needs is tools for solving their own problems. What they need is to build their own set of resilience skills, so they can establish a feeling of personal empowerment and believe in their ability to navigate life’s future challenges.
Reach out to someone who can help you understand the issues you or your child are facing and explore the pathways to feeling better. Whether that person is me or another mental health professional, make the call and have a conversation.
You will learn something, you will have options, and you will be one step closer to helping yourself or the person you love feel better.
Teens and Young Adults Can Learn Resilience
These skills help you take care of yourself and improve your relationships.
EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE SKILLS
…help you regulate your emotions and take care of yourself in highly stressful situations.
INTERPERSONAL SKILLS
…help you communicate effectively and build supportive relationships.
MIND-BODY SKILLS
…help you repair the physical effects of stress and access your Inner Wisdom when making decisions.
Self-awareness helps you make decisions and bring your best self to relationships.
Owning your STRENGTHS and using them as often as possible builds self-confidence and self-esteem.
Taking responsibility for getting your NEEDS met and taking care of yourself is a fundamental component of resilience.
Living in alignment with your VALUES is another aspect of resilience that makes you feel good about yourself, gives your life a sense of purpose, and builds self-esteem and confidence.
Making sure the BELIEFS by which you live your life actually serve you is one of the most powerful things you can do to gain a sense of control and empowerment.